How Doug and I Almost Broke Up Over Fantasy Football

Sarah once asked me to be in her fantasy football league and I told her I couldn't because fantasy football almost ruined my relationship. She kind of giggled and looked at me like I was crazy, but Sarah, the thing is, it is true.

Doug and I use to be in a fantasy football league together. He was the commissioner and I had a team with a friend of mine. My team was the Whoseville Grinch We played each other and I won, as reported on Doug's official website.

Except, the day after the results were listed as FINAL Doug called to tell me he had made a mathematical error or some other such nonsense and he in fact had won. As expected, I pitched a fit. Final means final right? The dispute was taken to the rules committee who, shockingly, were Doug's closest friends and all men and big surprise here, he won.

I was PISSED. We fought about this for weeks. FINAL MEANS FINAL. You can't change the score after it's FINAL. And the whole rules committee thing was totally rigged.

I dropped out the following season because seriously, we didn't talk to each other for weeks. Weeks, over fantasy football. In fact, this very post will probably spark a fight because I AM TOTALLY RIGHT AND DOUG IS TOTALLY WRONG AND HE CHEATED AND THE RULES COMMITTEE WAS CRAP.

FINAL MEANS FINAL.

But, in the end I chose my marriage over fantasy football. But, really, I don't want to talk about it.

Comments

[Sarah, Goon Squa]

Never play fantasy football with an attorney.Hilarious!

[10/16/2008 at 04:18 PM]

Seriously? You're so right on this one. I'd be 80 years old before I let this go, which is probably another reason why I'm still single.

[10/16/2008 at 06:58 PM]

this is probably like how my husband and i almost broke up over playstation.oromg how about the time he DELETED my csi off the tivo. I didn't speak to him for so long because it was MY TIVO and MY SHOW!Fucker!

[Stephanie10/16/2008 at 08:17 PM]

Dude, final totally means final. And if the rules were ambiguous and he drafted them, then they should have been construed against him. You win. Yeah, Sarah's right... lawyers should not play fantasy football.

[10/16/2008 at 09:15 PM]

Stephanie-I totally forwarded your comment to Doug!

[Sarah]

Jodi- You simply cannot argue FINAL. It's like my husband saying "I want to have more kids". AFTER he's had a vasectomy. FINAL IS FINAL. In every sense of the word.

[Sarah]

Jodi- You simply cannot argue FINAL. It's like my husband saying "I want to have more kids". AFTER he's had a vasectomy. FINAL IS FINAL. In every sense of the word.

[10/16/2008 at 09:47 PM]

Sarah-exactly! I say it was final and he changed it!

[10/16/2008 at 10:13 PM]

This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

[Mother Musing]

I'm laughing about this but sorry for you at the same time because you got hosed. You should have won! But in the end you picked what was really more important. But DAMN final IS final.I loved how you finished with... "But, really, I don't want to talk about it." Laughed right out loud.Thanks for sharing.

[Nancy]

J and I play fantasy hockey together. It gets quite ugly, especially after I won the league for 3 years in a row (and then finished 4th last year, which I don't really want to talk about...)I'm with you though. Final is final.

[Stacy]

Yeah. Funny you wrote this because I have been tossing around a few ideas in regards to my husband playing too many fantasy sports. I need to write something. It's so...relevant these days.

[10/17/2008 at 04:52 AM]

That totally sucks.If it was me, I'd have to sneak to some other league or something and try to win again apart from whatever my husband was doing. Just to show him. ;)

[10/17/2008 at 08:13 PM]

Ha! That is so funny! But I do think it was totally rigged. That's just wrong! Btw-not related to this post, but I saw your tweet about your diagnosis. I am sorry, but am also glad you have a name for it, so that your doctors can get you going in the right direction. Good luck!