L'Shana Tova

Happy New Year May next year be more sweet then bitter and go fill up on apples and honey and honey cake. See you tomorrow.

Looks Like I Need to Rewrite My 20 Things

#17 is no longer true. I did it, I told people in real life about the blog. Well, not all people, just the 4 other people that went away with me this weekend for girls weekend extraordinaire. We were sitting in Dumsers, eating ice cream after drinking too much wine at dinner, and I came up with the idea of telling each other something we had never told before, and when it was my turn I said, "I have a blog." One of my friends said she thought so, she had seen this but had never followed the link. Here exact words were "it was Jodi and Michael and was written with the sarcastic tone that only you have." (Long ago I had told Jessica she would be my blogging in the closet downfall) That was it. I gave them the web address, as well as the other sites I write for, it was no big deal. It was not mentioned again until the drive home when one of them announced they could not wait to get home and "take their laxative" and that prompted a whole conversation about strange sexual practices with small rodents and I turned around from the front seat and screamed, "I'm totally blogging this!" So, here's the thing. In real life friends, if you are actually here, if you read, you must, must, must comment. It's the rule. And that goes for the rest of the lurkers out there as well. I'm taking baby steps, starting with 4 of my closest friends and moving on from there. Maybe I'll be out of the blogging closet for good soon.

Apparently I'm Going to Have Lyme and Be Fat

I had a conversation with my doctor yesterday about my worsening symptoms and she asked me what my days were like, and she was all "WHAT, you are exercising for an hour to two hours 3-4 times a week. Cut that out. 30 minutes TOPS. Do less. Rest, rest, rest." Fabulous, just great. Except, I have a job, and a three year old, how much rest can one really get? This weekend is annual girls weekend at the beach house and I corralled someone else into driving and told the girls I'll have to rest, but still, no exercise. Hello fat Jodi. Even as I sit here, Doug is making dinner and unloading the dishwasher and making Michael's lunch for tomorrow. And you know what? I feel guilty sitting on the couch, watching tv, and blogging. There has got to be something biologically wrong with me. Did everyone else not know there was all this Lyme controversy? There are two schools of thoughts with Lyme. One is, traditional medical approach, throw 30 days of antibiotics at it and you are good, which is what I'm doing. There are also these Lyme Literate doctors that prescribe months and sometimes years of medications and supplements and who knows what works and what doesn't? I called an LLM and after talking on the phone and realizing I couldn't get in until December and they didn't take insurance and the first appointment was $1,500, I called an infectious disease specialist. I'm much more of a traditional approach kind of girl anyway. Thanks to Robbin who has been a life saver for me in navigating the confusing world of on line Lyme research. All relaxation all the time starts tomorrow when I'm getting mani/pedis with Amy prior to leaving for the beach where I have a massaged scheduled and lots of wine drinking. And sleeping. And whining some more about how this all sucks. Yeah, feel free to feel bad for me with multiple spa treatments and free beach house that comes pre stocked with free wine which I'm going to without a kid. Yep, my life is oh so tough doctor prescribed relaxation and all.

Well, Anglea Said It Was Ok

In the comments to this post, Angela indicated less frequent posting was fine as long as my posts included pictures. So here are pictures from the Renaissance festival this weekend. And of course, they were taken with my iPhone because I cannot remember to bring a camera anywhere.

 

It's Time I Admited Something to Myself

I'm sick. I know, I know, you are all thinking, of course you are sick. Didn't you tell us you had Lyme disease. That's sick, right? Um, yeah, except I haven't exactly been acting like I'm sick. I've been doing everything I've always been doing, working out, going to work, taking care of Michael, making sure this house runs like a (semi) well oiled machine, and keeping up with all of my social and writing obligations. And now, I'm exhausted. Last week Doug accused of being snappy for no reason. Foster had gotten into the pantry (again) and eaten his second full box of cheerios in a week which meant I would have to go back to the store. Doug didn't seem to understand why I believed this was the end of the world, and I lost it. "I don't feel well, I'm exhausted, my whole body hurts, and I'm still doing everything I always was, and you are not helping." And he acted like I was crazy. And of course he did because I hadn't expressed any of this before, I hadn't asked for help. Besides whining on twitter a lot that I was tired, I really hadn't admitted to any problems at all. Amy and Tracey both offered me a leave of absence from mamapop and I was all no, I'm totally fine and can totally still write four days a week. I asked for a leave of absence from DC Metro Moms and then promptly kept writing for them. I'm still going to the gym 3-4 times a week (which is down for me) and have not taken one sick day since this whole nonsense began. I'm not saying this to get some kind of martyr award, more to show how truly insane I am. Saturday night I was supposed to be to a party thrown by two of my favorite people in the world. We had spent the day at the Renaissance Festival and I tried to go, I really did. And then I sat on the couch and the exhaustion set in and I knew there was no way I was getting up from the couch. I went to bed at 9. I need to do something different in my life, something that is hard for moms. I need to make me a priority, not everyone and everything else. I'm going to start taking yoga, not for weight loss, but because it's good for me and may help with the joint pain. I'm going to post less (sorry) here, and other places as well. If I have to take some time off of work, well, that's what sick leave is for right? Saving it all for when Michael is sick isn't helping anyone. And, I need to ask for help, from Doug and from other friends who have offered. It's not fair to expect Doug to know I feel like crap and suddenly need help doing something I've always done. I just said no to an all day wine tasting bachlorette party. Wine tasting people, I said no to wine tasting. I love the bride dearly and really wanted to be there, but I have to be at my sister in law's 30th birthday dinner that night and knew there was no way I could do both. I've never been good at saying no and disappointing people but I'm starting to learn my limitations and that if I'm not healthy, I'm not good to anyone. I've got two more weeks on the antibiotics and I'm really hoping I start to feel better soon. But, I also need to make sure I'm doing everything I can to help that along.

It Should Be Wrong to Love Television This Much

Fine, I admit it, I'm a TV junkie. To be more accurate, I'm a tivo junkie. I live, live, live for tivo and when it broke, I cried for days. So, when Yoplait and Parent Bloggers Network asked what I couldn't live without, the answer was easy, tivo. Look, it's not just for me. It's not just so I can watch the shows I want to watch after Michael goes to bed, and I watch some really bad TV. It's also for Michael. Michael has no idea, and will probably never know, that TV has a schedule. When he asks for Blue's Clues, I give him Blue's Clues. The problem is he has started to ask for shows I don't tivo and I'm not sure what to do about that. Shows I've never heard of. I suspect his little friends at school are talking about them? Otherwise I have no idea. If tivo was a person I may leave my husband for it. It's definitely my second favorite thing in the world behind my iphone.

Let's Lighten Things Up a Bit, Shall We

More on Wine Camp.

I'm Breaking A Promise to Myself

I had promised myself not to use this place to talk politics. Anyone who reads me knows what side I am on, and you don't come here to hear me spout off on my beliefs (well, you do, but you know what I mean.) I'm not judging others that use their blog as a political space, but, that's not really me. But, something happened yesterday that made me change my mind.

I work in a building that houses most of the social welfare programs for my county. WIC, food stamps, energy assistance, you get my drift. And, I need to point out, I work for an incredibly rich county. I pulled into my building at 9:15 am and the parking lot was full. The satellite lot next door was also full and I parked on the street. This has become a usual occurrence in the past few months.

When the elevator doors opened to the second floor, where the programs are located, the waiting room was packed and the line snaked around the room. These are people, in a rich county, who need help. Help to pay for food, help to pay their electrical bill, help to secure the down payment for an apartment or else be homeless. Help.

The Republicans have cut these programs so much there is not much money there. And with this economy, more people need help. Anyone who does not think the economy is in trouble is sorely mistaken (John McCain, Sarah Palin, George Bush), and I urge you to walk into my building any weekday at 9 am.

I understand not everyone believes in social welfare, not everyone believes we should pay taxes to help people. That it is more important to fight unnecessary wars than it is to make sure people do not have to chose between gas for their cars or feeding their family. I am not that someone. I was talking to a Republican (yes I know some) yesterday who was telling me the economy was not in crisis, that this was all made up by "the liberal media." That the "liberal media" is turning everything Sarah Palin says around to make her look unqualified. Um, Sarah Palin is unqualified. If she is qualified to be VP then I am qualified to be AG. Hey, she was PTA president and I work in the County Attorney's office.

Fox News and the Republicans have done a very good job in convincing people that every other media outlet is biased. That when someone has the audacity to speak the truth that they are out to get them. It's a calculated effort and I'm terrified that it's working and will work come November.

A McCain/Palin ticket terrifies me on so many levels. I believe firmly in a woman's right to choose. Interestingly, McCain said in an interview, 2 days before he picked Palin, that he believed the Republican platform should be amended to allow abortion in cases of rape and incest and when a mother's life is at risk. That never happened and he picked Palin who does not believe that. Hypocritical much? Pander to your base much?

A McCain administration goes against everything I believe in. As an American, but also as a human being. We should not be invading countries when people in our own country are starving. When people cannot afford health care. When people can not afford their electrical bill.

I want to pull into work in the morning and have my pick of spaces.

DCMM: I Went To Sleep Away Camp, With Wine

My husband and I spent the past weekend at a resort that offered a "Food and Wine Camp."  It was our anniversary present to each other.  We are major "foodies" and I am an amateur wine sommelier so this was right up our ally. We drank wine and learned about wine and food pairings and spent the weekend with a wine sommelier and a 4 star chef. I gained 10 pounds, easily.

The weekend was all about "wonderfully crafted herb and wine pairings, experiential hands-on cooking classes and expertly prepared and paired Chef's Table Dinners."  But for me, it was about so much more than that.

I have spent the past weeks incredibly ill, bed ridden actually.  It's been a long haul, and I was eventually diagnosed with Lyme's disease. We went back and forth about even going, but eventually decided we could probably never find another weekend where my parents could watch my son the whole weekend  when they were offering the camp and decided just to do it.  if I needed to skip out on one of the activities and sleep, I would.

I am so, so glad we did.  Besides just being simply fabulous, it reminded me of what it was like to be healthy again.  The have fun again.  To not feel sorry for myself.  To connect with my husband.  To get away from my three and half year old and potty accidents and lunch making.  To be me again, just me, not mommy.

Don't get me wrong, I love, love, love being a mom.  But I also love being me.  And being a wife.  And I am a firm believer that partners need alone time, be it a weekend, an evening, or an hour, to reconnect and recharge and be someone other than Mommy and Daddy.  This was that weekend for us.  The weekend why we remembered why we feel in love.  And we came hone with 6 incredible bottles of wine.

But it didn't last long.  I knew my dream weekend was over the minute I got home and I immediately starting fighting with my son about pooping.

Good News Finally

I do have Lyme, doctor is 100% sure. But they also think the Lyme caused the dizziness and vertigo so I do not have two things wrong with me. The doctor expects a full recovery with little chance of relapse or chronic issues. Funny thing is, I haven't been dizzy for 5 days and then I got dizzy yesterday, right after I finished working out. I'm taking that as a sign to mean I shouldn't be working out. What exactly I am going to do about the weight gain that is going to cause is a whole other issue.